Show Them Love

Show Them Love

April 22, 2022 0 By Laura

I’m very aware of how I just simply cannot do everything. I can’t check every box daily and accomplish all the tasks, and I just can’t be intentional and productive and “on” 100% of the time. I can’t think about and succeed at every facet of parenting and adulting on a daily basis. I can’t work, eat, pray, exercise, shower, and sleep every day myself, much less in addition to making sure the kids are okay academically, spiritually, physically, socially, and so on. I just can’t do it all. I’m only one person and I’m severely outnumbered in my home. There are simply too many needs to meet and I can’t meet them all.

In all my moaning and groaning over this fact today (it was a hard day), I was gently reminded by the Lord that while I indeed cannot do it all, He can. And in fact, He already has. He has gone before me and He is already in the future and He’s already seen the fruition of this season and these challenges.

Even more than that, I find comfort in knowing that He knew I was going to be a single mom to these four kids. He knew that I would be solo parenting and that I would face these struggles and challenges and feelings of being overwhelmed. He knew I would be stressed about my kids’ grades, if they’re eating healthy enough, if they are growing spiritually, and if I’m teaching them enough life skills. He knew I would want to check all the boxes every day to make sure they’re learning all the things, but He also knew that I would never be able to do that to the extent that I desire.

But that has to be okay. It’s a weird feeling to think that being “less than” is totally fine. Like if I do succeed at doing all the things and checking all the boxes, I would probably lose my mind. I would slip into insanity and perfectionism and control freak mania, and I would disappear as a person. I would just be the mom and the organizer and the cook and the taxi driver. I wouldn’t be a separate person from my kids and their activities and their wellbeing, and I would get lost. Not to mention go a little bit crazy.

God picked me to be the mom to my kids, knowing full well that I would be doing it alone. He knew my limitations and my hangups and my struggles, and he still chose me to be their mom. He chose them to be my babies and he has and will continue to equip me with what I need to parent them and love them well.

Loving them is the key, isn’t it? Teaching them things is good and helpful, but love is vital. Love is what makes them trust us and rely on us and turn to us in times of need. Not just when they’re young but as they grow into teenagers and adults as well.

All I want is for my kids to love Jesus and love others, and I think that starts with showing them that they are loved. I absolutely love my kids more than I love life itself and would do anything for them, but sometimes I think I struggle to show them love in tangible and intentional ways. Sure, I feed them dinner and take them to practices and provide for their needs.

But how often do I slow down enough to just sit with them and love on them? How often do I choose my words carefully and watch my tone to ensure I’m loving them rather than heaping shame and judgment on them?

I can tell them all day that I’m doing what I’m doing out of love, but if they don’t feel that love outside of those tough moments, that’s not okay.

I tend to be extremely task-oriented and while that’s great in my profession and keeping a house, it’s not always great as a mom. I’m jumping from one task to another, from one to-do list to the next, and I’m forgetting that my tiny humans need me to show them love.

On hard days and good days, I want to be more intentional and more kindhearted in my interactions with my kids, and I want to do far more than just tell them I love them. I want to show them how deep my love is for them.