Facing the “Too Much”

Facing the “Too Much”

May 31, 2022 0 By Laura

Today felt like too much. I was too tired and too stressed and too frustrated and too overwhelmed. The kids were too loud and too demanding and too difficult and just too much. I was on the verge of tears for much of the day and truly couldn’t stop the tears from flowing a handful of times. I’m not that person. Or at least I didn’t use to be. How did I get here? Is this just a season? Just a chapter I’m struggling through where tears overtake me and emotions get the best of me, albeit temporarily? Or is this just who I am now? The overwhelmed mom who cracks under the stresses of daily life and who can’t make it through a difficult day, much less a difficult week, without suffocating under the pressure and crying in front of her children multiple times a day?

I don’t want to be this person. I don’t want to have another day like today. But how do I stop it? I can’t stop a day like today from occurring again, with its stresses and pressures and frustrations. But I can put myself in a better place mentally and emotionally so that I can take on the pressures of the day more effectively and in a healthier way.

I went to bring the trash cans in earlier and it felt good to take a deep breath outside. I need to remember that when I get frustrated again (tomorrow, most likely). Fresh air is good for the mind and soul.

I also need to allow myself to feel the things. I shame myself for being angry so often but I need to stop doing that. It’s okay to be angry. Life is hard and anger is a natural response to hard things and difficult people, and I’m allowed to be angry. I’m allowed to have bitterness and resentment bubbling under the surface. I can feel those things and not be sentenced to eternity in hell or be made out to be the worst mom in the universe. Mom rage is a thing, remember? I’m not the only one who feels this way, and I don’t need to make myself out to be.

That being said, I can’t stay stuck. I can’t get caught up in the anger and bitterness and resentment and stay muddled in those feelings forever. Because while I am allowed to feel them, I can’t let them dictate me or my feelings or my actions going forward.

So what’s my action plan for tomorrow? What am I going to do when I get mom rage and stuck in crappy feelings that I can’t seem to shake off? First, I’m going to step outside and I’m going to take a big deep breath and remember that it’s okay to feel however I feel. Then I’m going to acknowledge my feelings and name them. Then I’m going to pray. I’m going to pray for God to help me see past those big feelings and be appreciative for what I have and to not take things so seriously. Then I’m going to name things I’m thankful for and I’m going to praise God for his blessings. Then I’m going to go inside and be the mom that my kids need.

Lord, Help me remember that I am, in fact, the mom that my kids need. I was created for them, just like they were created for me, and I am equipped to be their mom. Help me shake off the fears that I’m ruining them or that they are destined to a life of inadequacy and anger and shame because of who I am and how I am. Help me redefine myself by your standards and promises and word, and help me live those attributes out in my daily life. Help me break generational curses that threaten my children and help me overcome the hard stuff so that they don’t have to. Let me fight the battles for them now, while I can, so that their battles later in life aren’t so fierce or raging. Help me not give too much credit to the enemy, but help me check myself and my mindset before getting down on myself. Lord, I know you are doing a mighty work in me and I have to remember that daily—it keeps me going. Help me not play the martyr or the victim and not get caught up in how hard things are, but help me focus on the blessings and the victories and the glory that will one day be fully realized.